Ch1: Voices – October 18, 1997

2015/04/02 at 8:21 pm

Surfing through the net, I suddenly had an urge to load a picture of Noriko Sakai, a famous Japanese singer in Japan. Anyway, I might as well tell you, I edited the picture to a highpass, exposed foreground. Very beautiful, both person and image enhancement. Anyways everytime I’m extremely bored, I would listen to one my compositions or someone elses compo’s. Compos are music composed on the computer using any format: WAV, MID, MOD, IT, XM, S3M, ST3, MTM, 669, FAR, ROL, SND, etc. Okay, so I’m surfing the net, at the same time looking at Noriko Sakai in color […]

Ch1: Voices – September 28, 1997

2015/04/02 at 7:52 pm

It has been some while since I did any journal entries, one thing is for sure; I bled out what was there and now only skin remains. Like a meatless shell floating in a pond full of life. I feel sick, not mentally, literally sick. Since Saturday morning, I had a cold, and a violent heat-wave on my forehead; but now it is okay; it’s just a common cold. It’s funny, that this has a deeper meaning than what is said, but for me to explain is like asking yourself, “Which one came first? Chicken or the egg?” [Audio clip: […]

My Book of Journals, Prologue

2015/04/02 at 7:45 pm

I looked up some super old files through some folders I have copied over from various origins and came across an old diary titled “My Book of Journals”. I read through a few entries dated late 1997 and noticed a few names, song titles and emotions that have since become shadowed by other things in my life. With that, I have decided to release those diary entries unedited into my blog with their original dates intact in the post. Also, I will be adding associated songs to the posts corresponding to the music I listened to while I had created […]

Diminished Kingdom

2013/06/21 at 3:29 am

In my youth, I was pretty ‘normal’ as far as ‘geekdom’ went. There was a fence that cordoned off an area of old farmland and behind those fences were the houses near where I lived. The fence made up three long sides and the other side was opened to a road. This was 1981 to 1986. Going back there, that entire farmland is now covered with houses. Mind you, these houses are at least 25 to 28 years old. I mentioned that fence because in my random flashbacks, I see those fences and that farmland and how I walked next […]

The annexation of Leeman

2012/03/19 at 11:01 pm

I use to have a huge entry in here originally published February 7th, just to replace it with one word: “No.” right afterward. It was a huge entry about desires and rhetoric. I felt I was too exposed and removed the entire entry. It showed the deepest crevices of my thoughts and emotions. Things that I am sure 99.9999% of the people out there, including even my closest friends would take at literal value. Indeed, some can be taken that way, but they don’t know the ‘back-story’, so it would be easily taken literally. Tune: “Change your mind” by Sunlounger […]

Bamboo Forest

2012/02/04 at 4:34 am

This song is from the ‘pondering days’ of my youth. The days after lost and exposure. This was 1999. A few weeks ago, my mom shed a tear for me with a slightly whimpering voice she said in Cantonese: “You choose the hardest path, walk the toughest road, through the thickest of obstacles to achieve a little enjoyment and when you get that sparkle of joy, life smacks you back down and you walk another difficult road. It breaks my heart to see you go through such a life.” Tune: “Shadow Fighter” by Sushi Brother (frank b remix) Mood: Heavy […]

Pedaling through the dark currents

2011/08/21 at 6:21 am

Tune: “Pagan Poetry” by Bjork Drink: Bombay Sapphire Gin Mood: Sleepy [Audio clip: view full post to listen] Not too long ago, Amber and I got into an argument in which she felt I was trying to mold her into my ideal lover. I wasn’t. The issue wasn’t hers. The issue was mine. Everyone whom have followed my blog since the beginning ‘should’ know that direct communication isn’t my forte when trying to explain/decipher my core, since the majority of my thoughts cannot be addressed with a simple “yes” or “no” statement. My thoughts are not so linear. I am […]