Before I Go To Bed

2006/04/24 at 2:26 am

2:46am (Listening to a song by Andy Lau – still don’t know the name to it damn it) WinRar finally finished compressing and splitting Cindy’s massive 2.2 gig folder up into five 420 meg files. Well, I mean it finished about 1.5 hours ago. I was just updating my web site – NexusColony.com – finally closed the main site and moved my own stuff in its place. Still waiting for Jason to accept my domain to point to the NC.com host space. So as I was testing the stuff, I had an urge to listen to this song again. It’s […]

Protection

2006/04/23 at 11:07 pm

8:26pm This entry is named in honor of one of my favorite songs by Massive Attack. (An hour and a half later…) I went out for a 20 minute bike ride, came back changed, stuff, then Pat called me and we talked for 30 minutes, then some other stuff happened and since my bro’s out, I’m going to use this chance to finally back up ALL 2.2 gigs of Cindy’s stuffs – videos, pictures, documents, etc. (Almost 2 hours later…) Ah, some more things happened. I finally took the last two hours to gather the rest of Cindy’s stuff and […]

Black & Red

2006/04/22 at 1:38 am

1:57am (Playing “Beyond Raging Waves (With Shinichi Kinoshita)” by DJ Krush) I like this one particular piece from DJ Krush. I don’t want to explain why though. Let’s just say, it reminds me of my duties now with help from the past. As you can see, I changed a few things. If you go to LeemanCheng.com or Leemanism.com, you will go to a ‘main navigation’ page. BEFORE I created this blog, I had the initial concept of using the two domains above as the forwards to my online portfolio. Since I no longer need my online portfolio, I’m going to […]

Dreamer

2006/04/19 at 1:43 am

1:59am (Playing “The Tune” by Url) Yumminess! I’m having my nightly dose of a shot and a half of Malibu and some sort of citrus surprise. Gotta try to be in bed by 2:15am LATEST! So supposedly, I’m a very naughty person. [grin] Seems like I’m entering an entry at least once every one or two days. I wanted to enter something ‘meaningful’ earlier, but was caught up in doing stuff.

Summer In June

2006/04/08 at 2:16 am

2:42am Since I was hoping to get some leads on Virginia’s new contact info, I loaded up some super old emails from 1998 to 2002. Back in the day, I used Mail Warrior to read my emails. Anyway, I went through the few folders I have and with this ambience playing in the background, I really felt a huge surge of sadness but sadness in a peaceful way. I read through Albert’s earliest emails to me in late 2000, Jon’s emails in mid 2000, some of my Jim Pattison, AWF, and Stern emails, and finally Summer In June emails – […]

Tea Girl

2006/04/07 at 11:47 pm

10:10pm Came back from work around 5:27pm. My dad loves to stay within the speed limit, which is a good thing. It takes him about 23 minutes to drive about 2 kilometres. On a good morning, it takes me about 7 minutes to get to work. On a good afternoon, it takes me about 15 minutes to get back home. SPEED KILLS! I agree. I should think about other people more. Anyway, I had to do some stuff, then took a 14 minute nap, then showered, dressed, etc, and out the door to Kirin on Westminster Hwy. It is my […]

After Eight’s Martini

2006/04/05 at 1:46 pm

The other night – Saturday April 1st, I went to Savage Driving Range with Edmund. It was about 8pm, and it was freakin cold for some ungodly reason! The whole time I thought, while I listened to Ed drive his balls down the range was well of course… 8/ Every time he hit the ball, I would take time to enjoy the sound of it. I even said to him, “I like the sound of it when you hit them.” I sat there, observing and thinking… “Yeah I know, my friends and family are now completely against her, and yes, […]

Cindy The Fox

2006/04/04 at 7:03 pm

I was just going through some of her things when my mind drifted to last last Friday night… Then I became really angry, because… Yes, this… AND FUCKING JUST FOR THE RECORD… This is the email I sent to Christopher Shum AFTER Cindy told me what they did ONE DAY AFTER we broke up in August 2005. ONE FUCKING DAY! Hey man… How are you doing? Thanx for kissing my ex-girlfriend. I really appreciate it. 8] If you want to go after her, do it completely. Don’t play around. If you want to fuck her, go find someone else. 8] […]

An Old Conversation

2006/04/02 at 2:45 pm

An excerpt from my MSN conversation with Albert on April 26th 2005: Albert says: She said, “You mentioned that you wanted to walk behind me or beside me to prove yourself that I can rely on you…I think you did show that yesterday while blading/biking however, what I prefer is someone who travels NEXT to me, not behind me.” I wanted to ask you…. Why do you do that exactly? Walk behind all the time? Chow Faan says: behind you, behind Jon, behind Cindy? 8) Albert says: yes, in general, it doesn’t bother me, but i do notice it of […]

Being Played

2006/03/31 at 12:09 pm

Ah, now I get it… Yeah I’m slow. I was thinking (not actively) about how Cindy was treating me and came to the conclusion that she was trying to break me. I remember on Saturday 25th this month, we were talking at my front door and she admitted that not only was she trying to test my threshold that eventually got out of hand, but when we first ‘dated’, she was playing the game – who will break first. Well, I broke first, cuz I fell in love with her… The reason why she thought we were playing a game, […]

The WoW Theory

2006/03/30 at 11:41 pm

Actually, there is no ‘WoW Theory’. It’s real. Oh yeah! It’s VERY REAL! Carlo called me ‘out of the blue’ earlier today, to see how I was, etc. We went out to Big River Red (or something like that) out near Silver City in Richmond. He had some sort of burger and I had some Garlic Fries. They aren’t really made of garlic mind you. It’s just some garlic fried with the fries. We both also had a pint of Guinness. Yum! Throughout the hour and a bit, a small part of our conversation (say about 15%) was him laughing […]

Finding My Rest

2006/03/30 at 1:32 am

Well, as ‘most of you’ have known since reading my friggin MASSIVE email that I sent to Donna yesterday, I have been ‘busy’ since March 2005. I know I have neglected the majority of my friends and family. It was pathetic of me to have allowed someone like Cindy to take ‘control’ of my life. Without getting INTO further details, can you all forgive me? Aside FROM Albert and John, I have to thank Laura for continuously checking up on me for the last two years. She actually keeps me sane, with her pictures, e-cards, and emails. I especially like […]

Last Kiss Goodbye

2006/03/25 at 2:25 pm

11:22am, March 25th I was just over at her house about 25 minutes ago. Just came home. I went over to her house around 6pm yesterday (Friday, 24th), sat and talked for a bit, molested/caressed her for a bit, then went to Flemming Elementary on the corner of 49th and Knight yesterday around 6:30pm. I watched her play vball for a bit, then her colleagues switched to floor hockey and she sat with me and talked about some dreams I had about her grandmother warning me to leave her. Then they had a game of basketball and some football throwing, […]

Broken Principles

2006/03/24 at 11:13 am

10:07am This goes against everything I believe in. I am indefinitely a weak, retarded fool. I also feel extremely bad for doing this – even moreso depressed now. I am indeed very weak to allow her to continue to hurt me. Where I can dish out blunt advice on DearCupid.org, I cannot even follow through with my own words and principles. As I go through this other possible ordeal, I regret making the contact with her last night. Though we chatted, she mainly ignored me, and when she said “BRB – taking out my contacts”, she never really came back. […]

Missing Her Plenty

2006/03/23 at 6:35 pm

It has been only 1.5 days. I miss her a lot, but I’m not nearly as devastated as I was back in mid April 2005. This time, the difference being I am/was sick and tired of the way she treated me. The thing is I came to work today, and aside from missing her, I feel exactly the same. I am still lonely, alone, and blah. Last night after my meeting, I went over to Dragon-In-The-Sky’s place, then he drove us to Richmond. We walked around a residential area near Alderbridge Way and #4 Road. I spilled my thoughts to […]